Breaking up is a sentimental situation for anyone, despite how great or terrible the relationship was. It might have been the worst type of toxic or the most affectionate relationship; however, the idea of existing without that specific someone is enough to make you wish they were right there with you. They might have been your childhood or high school sweetheart, "true" love, a mother or father of your children, or just a person that brought immense happiness to all the aspects of your life. Missing your ex might tempt you to think that these emotions imply that you still have feelings for them and want them back. This may be true or not; however, chances are you are not even seeking to have them back into your life at all. However, it is vital first to acknowledge that you are feeling those emotions.
There are tremendous reasons why you might miss your ex. It could be possible that you yearn for the person you used to be while dating them. You might have been a free-spirited person with them, and now you could give anything to experience just a sliver of that. This is okay because you can trace it back without necessarily needing them, but by focusing on yourself. Missing your ex could be because you want to feel the spark. Much is can be said about how great it feels to have that spark with someone, and it can be quite obsessive. Besides, after a break-up, you also desire to feel loved. By thinking of your ex, nostalgia kicks in about how amazing that felt… being needed and loved.
Furthermore, you could be missing your ex because you want the motivation they gave you. Perhaps they inspired and challenged you to be more creative and relentless. You might be yearning for the life lust experience, and maybe this feeling is connected to your ex; you experienced a passion for life when they were around. Other reasons for missing your ex could also be you miss their friendship generally, need to escape from reality, boredom, miss fantastic sex, and you only want to feel hopeful for the future.
You may also want to make your ex miss you. However, some people approach it the wrong way by immediately entering the dating game after the break-up. This may work, but it may pose a challenge to any chances of ever reconciling, that is if you want to. The most suitable tactic to provoke your ex to miss you is to show them what they are missing. If you haven't cut ties on social platforms, post photos expressing self-love by spending quality time with friends and family. Avoid acting in a way that may you look desperate or make them dislike you. If you are still on speaking terms, let them know that you are thinking of them; make use of the inside joke you both shared once.
If you have decided to move on completely, but you find yourself thinking of them every time you are free, try as much as you can to occupy yourself with more helpful activities; make sure you are settled. Some may choose to jump back into the dating world or some may not; if you are not yet ready, try talking about your emotions to your close friends and family… they might help you during the healing process.
Just remember, your process is YOUR process… just don’t get stuck there too long.
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